Well, the time has finally come – The Flesh of The Sea written by me and Shelley Lavigne is here. The ebook version dropped last month, but now with the paperback released, I feel like I can let out this breath I’ve been holding.
It’s been … an interesting adventure, to get here.
TFOTS was a half-formed idea in early 2022, after Andrew asked the Darklit authors if they had anything to pitch for a pirate horror series. I explained it to Shelley, who was practically clawing at the screen to add concepts and creatures; so the most logical step was simply to ask if they’d like to write it together. I’m endlessly thankful they said yes. It’s the most work and time I’ve put into anything in my life, and I genuinely am proud of it and what we created. Our hearts and souls are in this, our passions and humour and love for each other as fellow queer weirdos.
Originally slated for a summer 2023 release, it kept getting delayed. We were fine with this, as it allowed us to refine the story until it shined like a fucking diamond. Our beta readers, and our editor, helped immensely. But then… Andrew, excited about the success of other Indie Horror Kickstarter campaigns, wanted to launch one for the pirate series. What was meant to start in January kept being pushed back, saying KS didn’t like the campaign and he needed to resubmit it, or other reasons I can’t recall anymore. It eventually went live from March to April, with moderate success. However, Andrew soon informed the group that he was stepping back from publishing to focus on his family life. I felt this was long needed, as he was always doing a million things and had no assistance with the Press. It was often difficult to reach him or get much more than a “heart” on your message.
When he did leave, for whatever reason, did not give us access to important documents or accounts. Many things that were said to be done and ready, were not. I realized this was a pattern of behaviour the entire time, that I’d be brushing off because “that’s just how publishing is”. But it shouldn’t be. My novella shouldn’t have been published with typos. Our collection shouldn’t be unavailable for months after launch.
It was chaotic, and extremely stressful. I’ve been having panic attacks every few days for months and I am exhausted. TFOTS date was pushed back several more times – and then we started having issues with KDP/zon. Our files were correct, everything was in order, but it kept getting rejected. Any hype or excitement during a preorder period was destroyed. It was only yesterday, one day before release, that the book became available on .CA. Of course I want our book to succeed, to reach it’s intended audience – but it feels like the ship has already sailed, and that’s frustrating. It’s not one person’s fault, just a mountain of issues compounded. One thing that has kept me hopeful are the early reviews, that to the few who -are- reading it – they come to love our boys, just as we do. I don’t want these bad spots to ruin what is, at its core, a story about chasing your dreams.
On top of this, due to Darklit closing, my two other books, Inside Out and SICK! (with Shelley and Eric) were essentially homeless. This nearly broke me. IO has been through 2 previous publishers. And now – it had lost a home AGAIN. After some more panicking, I spoke with a dear friend who kindly offered to re-home the books. It will take a while, as all things in publishing do, but that is okay. I will be okay.
I am not writing this with any intent other than decompressing my feelings from the past few months. (This is also why I am literally going on vacation the same day the book releases.) I’m thankful to all my friends and loved ones for their support during all of this, and my sporadic messages as I phase in and out of the void. I appreciate you all being on this journey with me. Onwards and upwards, as they say!
From sea to stars.
LORMAGGOT 